Gigi Rox

Gigi Rox

Vida Fantabisher

One of my closest friends is a performing drag artist who goes by the name of Vida Fantabisher; I have been a fan of hers since she first revealed herself to the world back in 2008. Since January this year then she has grown to be one of Cape Town’s fastest rising and best drag performers. Vida made her performance debut at Bubbles Bar in January 2012, performed at The EVH Pink Awards the next month and not long after that Lola Lou (the owner of Bubbles Bar) offered her a slot on a Saturday night which she has since turned into a successful night of cabaret, comedy and partying. She brings her A-game every time she hits the stage, looks fabulous while doing so and has earned herself a healthy following of people who are as varied as my hairstyles. I consider myself to be her biggest fan but there are many others who will dispute my claim. Die mense is mal oor 'n Vida!

Last week Vida issued a challenge to the people who she invited to her 50th birthday party; anyone who wanted to dress up and perform a song cabaret style had the opportunity to do so at her birthday party and after giving it some heavy thought I decided to accept her challenge. I told very few people of Gigi’s impending stage debut just in case I gave a busted performance but in hindsight that was of no use since Vida’s birthday party had Bubbles packed to capacity. Back in April my friends decided to change my nickname from Gina to Gigi Rox (this happens occasionally no matter how hard I try to defy it) and I figured that open stage was the perfect spot to debut Gigi; a character I’ve been slowly developing and wanting to use in my stand up: Gigi is a hairdresser by day and club singer at night who is not really progressing on stage, mainly because she’s kinda kak and her song choices are as 90s as an episode of Living Single. Yes I know the character needs more work…

Fast forward to Friday night… I bought a pack of 3 special razors to shave my legs and armpits with; all three razors are now blunt. I had no idea I had so much body hair especially since I’m the least hairy guy I know. After shaving my legs and armpits I left my house and entered Bubbles looking like myself. I had a drink (three actually) and then operation Gigi commenced. Vida and Lola beat my mugg me the house down! There were tears which smudged my eye make-up which had Lola reapplying my eye make-up which lead to more tears but she eventually finished and when I saw Gigi in the mirror for the first time I was like WHOA! I’ve seen the contestants on RuPaul’s drag race completely transform themselves with make-up but I had no idea how powerful it could leave a bitch looking, not to mention feeling. Lola, Vida and I discussed how the show would flow and it was decided Vida would do two numbers and engage with her crowd for a bit then bring me on. While she was on stage doing her art I stayed in the green room running through the lyrics and moves I wanted to use in my first song which was Queen Latifah’s U.N.I.T.Y. 

U.N.I.T.Y.

 


One Minute To Show Time…

I gave myself one last look in the mirror and saw my tuck wasn’t as effective as it was the last time I checked which was less than 5 minutes ago. I tried rectifying the situation but nothing worked so I thought “Fuck it” and Naomi Campbell walked (or at least my version of it) to the stage. Vida handed me the microphone, the music started and I tried my best to remember every word to a rap song which I have been loving since 1994; you’d think that would be the easy part but once you’re on stage there are so many things running through your mind failure seems like the only thing left to do… I messed the intro up but kept it going only to discover my mouthing of the song as opposed to actually singing it was completely destroying my performance. I tried making eye contact with some members of the crowd but that made me feel even more awkward. I was at the point of dropping the mic to the ground and walking off with the last shreds of my dignity when I saw Vida mince past shouting “You must just shine!” From that point it was on! I closed my eyes, took off the jacket I was wearing (it was supposed to look ghetto) and went for the song the way Gigi was supposed to. I don’t remember the rest of the performance and I hope nobody recorded it but the crowd seemed to love it and that’s all that matters to me at end of the day.

My next song was Chanté Moore’s Chanté’s Got A Man; I wore a more forgiving dress (in the crotch area I mean), decided (at the last minute) to take the wig off and wore my favourite pair of high heels. By the time I hit the stage I was a little drunker and I guess that was just what Gigi needed to have a better performance. The rest of the night is a blur but the reviews have been positive thus far but that could be more because everyone is being kind since it was my debut performance. The performing drag queens I’m exposed to on a regular basis tend to make their art look so easy but I now know first-hand about how hard, time consuming and painful it all is. I have an even bigger respect for Vida Fantabisher, 3D, Manila Von Teez, Samantha Knight and Lola Lou; they make it look so effortless, do it for the love of it and for very little thanks. I salute you bitches and will support y’all whenever I can! I don’t think Gigi Rox will be making any appearances any time soon again, being a busted drag queen is not my idea of a fun time. One thing is for certain though; I've been doing stand up comedy for almost two years, yes I've had some terrible gigs and I've done a couple of truly fantastic ones (thank God); no other performance can compete with the power I felt while wearing make-up, high heels and a dress which is interesting since I've never felt that vulnerable either, but I guess that's an entirely different blog entry...

Follow the girls on twitter: @VidaFantabisher, @BubblesBarCT, @manila_von_teez, @samanthaSHOWBIZ, @THREE_D_

 Pics courtesy of PJ Smith, Alexander Tabisher and Emile van der Heyde, not that I asked their permission to use them...

Father's Day

It's Father's Day today and my mind is filled with so many thoughts which with a little editing might just make for a worthy blog entry so here goes...

Father's Day used to be such a bitter affair for me but this year (2012) things are very different...

This year I find myself pitying the man I jokingly (with a hint of not-so-much) refer to as my sperm donor. I've come to realise that for the past 29 years HE has been missing out on my life not the other way around. 29 years of knowing you have a son and not being man enough to be that boy's father can't be easy on the ego. So much time has passed, time that could've/should've been spent on getting to know a man that's turned out to be pretty amazing (even if I do say so myself) but he chose to do other things and that's okay by me now; he made his choices and has to live with the consequences thereof for the rest of his days.

The last time I saw him was at my uncle's funeral last month. I saw him in the church but I never even recognised him (before that I saw him at my grandmother's funeral back in 2008 and it's not like's he's gained weight or anything) and when one of my cousins pointed him out to me later at the graveyard I was surprisingly unaffected by his presence. I had no desire to confront/punch him like in the past and as strange as that non-reaction was for me, it felt rather nice; grown up almost.

If the man ever does come to a point where he wants to pursue a father-son relationship with me I feel like I'm strong and emotionally intelligent enough to accommodate him without actually caring if it all works out or not, he must just know drinks are on him.

My hatred of him has evolved into a mixture of pity and indifference and that's rather sad, for him I mean...